Know the five phases of love

TrendingBash
4 min readNov 6, 2020

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five phases of love
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In the course of a partnership, you usually go through five phases of love if you make it to the end at all and don’t quit before that

Oh, how nice it would be: We fall in love, enter into a relationship and everything remains as easy and carefree as it was at the beginning. However, everyday life usually looks very different.

But this is (unfortunately) completely normal, after all, love — just like us humans — is not constant, but rather goes through many different phases in the course of a relationship, which very few couples can avoid.

According to couple therapist Roland Weber, there is a very specific number that every love relationship goes through: You have to go through a total of five phases before you can be sure that you have found the right partner.

However, some never make it to the end and get stuck in one of the previous sections forever or end the relationship early …

Phase 1: being in love

We know this phase only too well: We have butterflies in our stomach, have to think about the other person all the time and look at everything, especially our new partner, only through rose-colored glasses.

We practically do not recognize negative sides or we push them aside.

Usually this first phase of being in love lasts for three to 18 months and has a decisive influence on what the future relationship will look like, since this is where the couple grows together.

Phase 2: The Reality

Little by little, the strong feeling of being in love at the beginning diminishes — for many couples it is over by then.

Most couples split up in phase 2. No wonder, after all, it is unsettling at first when the feelings are suddenly no longer so great and we notice negative things that we had not noticed or ignored before.

So you can still notice things that connect with each other, but above all what separates comes into focus.

In the end, a relationship can only survive this phase if both realize that you can never go back to the euphoria of the beginning.

The butterflies won’t come back and holding onto them would be fatal. Instead, real, true love can only begin now. Finally, in this section we begin to see the other as

Check this James Bauer’s Try His Secret Obsession

Phase 3: The fight

If you realize that, that doesn’t mean you have come to the end of difficult times.

Instead of making compromises, in phase 3 you look for conflicts, want to assert yourself and gain power in the relationship .

Often you are sure that you are not with the right person.

Anyone who now thinks that it is best to throw the gun in the grain and give up is wrong: only at the end of this complicated phase can you really finally accept your partner for who he is — with all its rough edges , Weaknesses and mistakes.

After all, you’ve now seen everything there is to see.

Phase 4: The balance

In the fourth phase, everything that needs to be negotiated has already been negotiated.

You know exactly who the other and what the relationship itself is.

Therefore the time has now come to concentrate your energy on yourself and to work on your own personality — with the backing of a stable partnership.

In this section it is not always easy to find the right balance between the I, you and we, as you create more space for yourself again.

On the other hand, the interest in our partner is growing again, who on the one hand we perceive as an independent person, but on the other hand we also know exactly that he belongs to us.

Check this James Bauer’s Try His Secret Obsession

Phase 5: the home

The last and deepest phase of love is characterized by great trust.

In this section you know exactly who you have by your side and after all the ups and downs you can confidently say: Yes, that is true love.

You feel like you have come and see your partner as home.

However, since many couples give up in the first three phases, it is all the more rare — and special — to even make it this far.

These are the five phases of love

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Kelly Eden Devin Mehra

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